Friday, August 03, 2007

Don't Stand So Close to Me

I don't think I'm into hair petting, but I think I'd make an exception if I ran in to this guy (Peter Steele of Type O Negative) on the street!

While on vacation, I had ample opportunity to catch up on my pointless magazine reading, and in one of my mags (Allure, maybe?) there was a brief mention about hair petting. If, like me, you haven't heard about this, apparently there is a hair petting game, the goal of which is to touch random strangers' hair while out in public without getting caught.

Hair petters have a whole set of rules and techniques for playing their game. I found a pretty good overview of the game's guidelines on hairpetting.blogspot.com and have copied it to the end of this post. There are numerous videos on youtube where hair petting players have posted their conquests.

What do you think about this "trend?" While touching someone's hair isn't aggressive or overly invasive, I don't think I'd want to be either a petter or a pettee. The whole thing is kind of...well...creepy. Some people love to have their hair touched, their heads rubbed, etc....I am not one of those people. And going around touching people's hair yucks me out a bit. People don't always wash their hair regularly, and while I don't have a germ phobia, I don't like the idea of touching potentially dirty things when I don't have to.

That said, I do love running my hands through my husband's long locks and rubbing down my nephew's mohawk/crew cut (or whatever he has at the time!). I guess I'm on the fence about the whole thing. It may be fun for others, but I have no desire to join in! Leave me a comment and let me know your thoughts.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Hair Petting Game Guidelines

The point of the game is to pet some hair...without getting caught!

Whoever earns the most points, wins. Extra points for more difficult pets.

IF you are caught, you MUST play it cool. Never, ever ever blow your hair petting cover, or you will not win the game.

DISCLAIMER: It is the responsibility of the PETTER to choose the appropriate time, place and especially PETTEE.

FOR EXAMPLE: Rush hour or tourist spots are prime Hair Petting Game Time. On the other hand, petting in a desolate area, alone at night might not be a winning strategy. In terms of pettee selection, a potential pettee who appears angry and looks capable of inflicting great bodily harm on you may not be the best choice. Petting children is not recommended, especially by men. Be a petter-phile, not a pedophile. Strategize appropriately to maximize your petting potential!

TECHNIQUES:

The Palm-to-Fingertip Pet
The simplest hair pet there is. Starting at the base of the palm, pet in a downward motion, ending at the fingertips. POINT VALUE: 1 point per pet. Multiple pets possible.

The Pony Tail Grab

Wrap the entire hand around the pony tail. POINT VALUE: If pettee is staionary, 2 points per one-one-thousand-count. If pettee is on the move, 5 points per one-one-thousand-count.

The Double Pet
Petting two separate heads of hair within an 8 second time frame (without getting caught!)
Point system is based on the technique used, but the points are doubled.

The Celebrity Pet
Spotting a celebrity and petting him/her without getting caught is a challenge. First you need to find an unsuspecting celebrity. Then you must pet the hair without a body guard intervening. POINT VALUE: 1 million points *Celebrity friends "pretending" to be petted do not count.*

The Crew Cut Pet
This is for hair 1 inch or shorter. Difficult to pet! Just brushing the hair with the hand counts as a pet. POINT VALUE: 10 points

The Bald Pet
Is this even possible to do without getting caught? POINT VALUE: 1 Billion points

The Mohawk Pet
Mohawks are rare. Finding and petting one should be commended. Careful of the product goop. POINT VALUE: 100 Points

The Mullet Pet
Mullets are funny, and oh-so-petable! But be careful. Those who rock the mullet are scientifically proven to have shorter tempers. POINT VALUE: Girl Mullet - 10 Points Boy Mullet - 20 points

HAIR PETTING TIPS:

It is always a good idea to carry Purell in your purse or pocket. Because you can never be sure where that hair has been!

Sneakers are a good choice of footwear. Dress shoes are loud and can draw unwanted attention to even the most secret of hair petters. Sneakers can also come in handy In the unlikely event you need to make a quick escape. If you're playing the game properly you should not be detected. Having to run away results in disqualification.

Pretending to talk on the phone is another good way to distract the pettee from suspecting anything. How can you be petting hair if you're talking on the phone?

Using the phrases "Excuse Me," "Oh, I'm sorry" and smiling are always helpful if the pettee turns their head mid-pet. Play it off, and by the time the pettee has processed through his/her confusion, suspicion, and doubt, you will be long gone.

So there you have it. The Hair Petting Game that's sweeping the nation.

Don't be Scared - Pet Some Hair!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

ick! i dont want some strange weirdo intentionally touching my hair like that. i dont get the appeal of the whole thing.

Michelle said...

omg.. that guy is soooo hot.

wow.

I'm going to go back and look at that picture again.

Lydia said...

Ha! Michelle, you totally crack me up! He IS totally hot though, and to make things even better, he's like 6 ft 6. Yum! :)